Jan 13 2009
Stress and AgingMy sweetie (hereafter referred to as 'S') and I had a long discussion this morning about stress. We had just watched CBS' Sunday Morning, where they did a story about the presidents and the aging that became apparent over the course of their years in office. One researcher claims that the presidents age 2 years for every one year in office. There were before-and-after photos of FDR, Nixon, Carter, Reagan, George the First, Clinton and W. All had acquired lines, white hair, and a weary countenance. The point of the story was that stress ages presidents more than it ages the rest of us.S made the claim that stress is stress; that all people, all jobs, all parts of life become stressful if we let it. That more stress is not worse stress. His mother became stressed one time, he related this morning, just because she had invited us to dinner. She stressed all week over it, and his contention is that she chose to be stressed, that she cared too much what her guests might think or desire. I expressed a hope that I hadn't done that TO her, since the diva has been known to be um, a bit, err, picky? persnickety? passive aggressive? [I know! The Diva?? How? What?] No, S says, she did it to herself, despite all of her early training of her son to Disregard What Other People Think. My own new motto is: "What other people think of you is none of your business." It's my motto, but it's hard for me to live it: not to care what other people think of me. I've had a lifetime of training to observe, to judge, to comment. It's hard to cast that off. Stressful, even.I think there are quantities of stress (Life piling on) and qualities of stress (losing your job versus tight shoes) as well as ongoing stress (I need a break! When will this end?) and that all of them have various effects on our relationships, our mental outlook and our physical aging. But:I feel that the president has the lives of millions of people in his hands and that is a bigger stressor than whose turn it is to clean up after lunch. S feels that the President has so much help that We The People don't have, that his stress levels are effectively changed. Walk the dog? Bring in the groceries? Tidy up? Take out the trash? Next meal? Make the bed? Pay the bills? Pick up the dry cleaning? Make him a sandwich? Someone else will do that for him. (For S, too...) Less stress. Focus on the big picture, day at a time. Get good help.I think that to be effectively cut off from the real world is a stressor. When We the People need a break or to stretch our legs we can go out for a movie, take a walk, grab a burger, check our Blackberry. George W has said that it was easier to stay in than to try to get out to any of D.C.'s many wonderful restaurants due to security issues. (For what it's worth, it's also the reason he didn't have them land Chopper One in New Orleans after Katrina...) I wonder how the First Ladies have shouldered this stress burden. None of them have complained in public to my knowledge. They have smiled demurely, deflected the press and gone off to perform their favorite civic duties. I am sure they worried about their spouses' blood pressure, mental outlook and physical health, even with a doctor on staff. More stress.On January 20, they powder their noses and attend the parade down Pennsylvania Avenue for the Inauguration, knowing that someone else is packing and moving their personal belongings out of The Residence, and that at the end of the day, they'll be sleeping Somewhere Else. I'm still waiting for the before-and-after pix of the former First Ladies. I know the past 8 years are written clearly on my own face, no fault of the Current Occupant. So, what do you think? Tell me about stress and aging.