Mar 30, 2008How did this happen?Current mood:drainedAfter enduring the 17 weeks of February this year, March has vanished! What the hell happened? I was looking forward to a couple of very important birthdays, a trip to Disneyland, a couple of weekly (and weakly, oh brother, I need to practice) watercolor classes, Easter with a bubbly grandgirl, and renewal in our home by way of new colors: paint, carpet, window treatments, the works...I blinked and now here comes April! And it’s still snowing! And my flowers are getting trammeled! (Is that the word? or is it bammeled? flammeled? whammeled?)And I don’t care! And the house is painted! and the birthdays happened! and Easter eggs were here and there! and my shoulder aches and my thumb is tired! and suddenly, there goes March. It was nice while it lasted.I have to say a heartfelt and hearty thanks to Nessa and her fine friends and quite a few of my own who rallied behind me (No pushing!Stop shoving!) and got me through this year’s February meltdown. I really feel that true cleansing has occurred, and it is due almost entirely to the kindness of strangers and former strangers, now my dear friends and companions. In the course of one of my replies, I realized that the old saw, "It takes a village" became true in a whole new way for me. I realize that no one is really alone who does not choose to be. "Alone" is one of my preferred states, having taught grade school for a long long time...one begins to appreciate quiet after that. No one tugging your arm, patting your chest, hip, butt, thigh, whatever’s in reach, in a bid for help, no one spraying through missing teeth their retelling of last night’s "The Brady Bunch" onto your egg salad sandwich during a lunch time tutoring session. But I digress. This amazing online village has lifted my dank soul out of some pitiful mire and lighted the darkness for me. I really feel that I am well on the way to healing, precious life-sustaining healing. I’m tempted to apologize for wallowing in self-loathing mixed with self-congratulation in such a public manner, but that would be dishonest. I couldn’t have found a better source for healing than all of you who showed up to lend a hand and a heart. You know who you are. Thanks, and may you, too, find peace.